(audio version available at the end of this blog)

My new blog series highlights the reasons why hiring the right coach will help you live and work better.

So often when I meet with clients they are reluctant to tell me what they really want out of their lives.  They want to dive into something new but the fears combined with the perceived obstacles are overwhelming.  And they rarely reveal it until I ask.

By starting something I am not just talking about a new business.  True, what you want could be related to founding that internet company you have always wanted, or it could just as easily relate to working at a new company, taking the plunge with a new intimate relationship, writing a book, or starting a family.

So I ask every client to state two to three goals they would love to work towards while coaching with me.  It’s a softer approach than, “tell me what you want out of life.”

I receive two primary responses from my coachy inquiry.

The first, “Wow, I have never thought about goals so precisely and so broadly.”  And unless you are a sorcerer I can tell you that is why you are not achieving.  Sure dumb luck plays a role, but more often than not “being in the right place at the right time” happens to those people who position themselves for those opportunities.

How can we know these opportunities exist if we are not consciously working towards seizing them?

So goals are critical.  But not just any goal.

My clients assess (using proprietary coaching tools) the likelihood that their goal will increase their well-being.  What is the point of achieving if it makes us miserable along the way?

The second response, “I have thought about this for such a long time but I have never stated it publicly.”  And that’s an enormous obstacle to goal achievement.  You must come out of your goal closet first before we can delineate the steps involved in making it happen (once we determine it is a goal that is worth achieving for you).

Getting precise and making it public are the hardest steps for clients.  They fear that by “putting it out there” and not obtaining it, well, that makes them failures.

I would argue it makes you a lousy self-scientist.  How can we possibly learn anything about ourselves without establishing new experiments to discover what makes life worth living for us?

And an excellent goal requires a series of experiments to determine if it is truly what we want.  If it turns out it is not what we want, then we change the goal and create new experiments to test along the way.  If we remove the psychological weight of failure, we are more likely to experiment our way to achievement.

For many of us getting started is hardest.  However, if you have an idea, work with a coach to assess it, and work with a coach to accomplish it.  It is often your greatest chance to create the momentum required for achievement to happen for you.

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If you have any questions about coaching please feel free to contact me at scott@kineticcoaching.co, and remember I always offer a complimentary 30-45 minute session to prospective clients to determine if we want to work together.